According to Shaunti Feldhahn, most couples get divorced or choose to cohabitate for one reason – lack of hope. Why? They all hear these statistics and conclude, What hope do we have?
- 50% of all marriages end in divorce
- the divorce rate in the church is the same as the world
- 80% of all married people claim they are unhappy
- 70% of all second marriages end in divorce
- Marriage is hard and there’s no way to win
The truth is, none of these statistics are true. They are all simply myths and misinterpretations of research. The real statistics are much more hopeful.
- The divorce rate in America is about 36%
- The divorce rate of active church goers (2x per month, regardless of socio-economic status) is about 18% … half of that of the world
- 80% of all married couples report that they are happy
- Divorce is rarely about a “big ticket” item, therefore, little efforts can make a big difference
So what? Well, these statistics provide hope. Which is more hopeful, believing that half of all marriages end in divorce or that you have a high chance of making it? Which is more hopeful, believing that Jesus makes no difference whatsoever in married life or knowing that active faith can reduce your chances of divorce by half? Which is more hopeful, ministering believing that you are not making an ounce of difference or ministering knowing that God is right and His ways work?
I don’t know about you, but I think I’m going to go and give my wife a hug and tell her how much I love her.
Notes taken from Shaunti Feldhahn’s lecture at the FAM Conference hosted by Homeword Ministries, May 10-12, 2012.